And then She Went Mad

Since you have't heard much about how my novel, Capture Me Strong, is going, you may have pictured something like this:

Jessie printed  out her manuscript, read over a few pages, realized she had the beginning of the story ALL WRONG. Again. And then she tore the manuscript to pieces, went mad and tossed it in the garbage. Then she realized it was only the beginning that was wrong, so went dumpster-diving to pick out the shreds and tape them back together. Only to discover the end wasn't very good either. And then she drank some tea. 

But no. I DID print out the manuscript. And now I'm raking through it to fix tiny typos and such. I shouldn't be raking through. They say a writer never truly feels like the book is finished and ready, but you just have to take the plunge and decide it's done, dangit, at some point.

I just don't want to give this manuscript to my (FANTASTIC) beta readers and them find a bajillion typos and think I'm a bafoon wannabe writer. But...that might happen anyway, so...

I also have to mail it to myself because then it will be copyrighted, so if anyone tries to steal it, they will be in giant trouble.  Don't steal. Plagiarism is the worst sin. Satan got kicked out of heaven for plagiarizing  Or...was it something else...? (It was.) 

So, what am I dong in the meantime? 

Oh, nothing. Just...a little something called NaNoWriMo. What? Oh, you can't read that. I said NaNoWriMo!!!! Don't know what that is? National Novel Writing Month. Write a 50k word novel in the thirty days of November. Want to know more? Check out the site. 

I'm doing this, but I'm getting a dreadfully late start. It's day 15 (exactly halfway ohmygosh!) because, you know...life happened. Ahem. I MARRIED THE LOVE OF MY LIFE! His name is Gary. I'm quite fond of him. My name is now...(ready?)...(drum roll, please.)...Mrs. Jessie Mullins! That was official on Octoer 20th. Yay! 

And also my computer died for good. So. We're living together now. Paying bills and stuff. Gary is amazing enough to tell me it's okay (he even wants me to because he believes in me and my writing so much) focus on my writing and not get a "real job". Not many people believe in me like he does. Aah. So, anyway...bills and stuff. And so I don't have a computer right now. This means when I can work on NaNoWroiMo, I need to binge-write to get this baby done. (Then why am I making a blog post??) I assure you, I will get it done. BEAST! 

To wrap it up, here' a quick synopsis of my NaNoWriMo novel, which is also the next novel I will be seriously working on toward my career and dreams of being a published author. I'm calling it Ashes to Ashes for now. 

Frances loses her dad to stage four prostate cancer the night of her high school graduation. All she has known for the past seven years was taking care of her dad. With her mom gone, too, and her big sister's disappearing act four years ago, Frances has had no life aside from getting good grades and keeping her dad alive as long as possible. When he passes, Frances can think of nothing to do except to honor her dad's dreams of riding his Harley across the country to the Hollywood sign. Problem: She's deathly afraid of motorcycles. Oh, and her sister is suddenly back in the picture...with a very cute, and very bad, motorcycle-riding cowboy. 

He miiiight look like this. Enjoy. 

 Thanks for reading! 

Jessie 

How I Got Over a Nasty Case of WB

Urban Dictionary (truly the most reliable of all dictionaries) defines Writer's Block as such:

A point in writing where the writer runs head first into a brick wall in their writing process. Which may result in a writer bashing their head repeatedly into their keyboard/laptop/notebook/etc. until words or blood is freely flowing. Also might be because the characters are fed up with all the crap the author puts them through and go on strike.

What usually causes Writer's block for me is the much dreaded and only useful half of the time Inner Editor. Dun Dun DUN.

My Inner Editor looks like this. She doesn't bake me cookies or offer me iced tea. She's as mean as she looks. And she says stuff like, "You can't put that in your book--your parents, uncles, pastor, ladies in prayer group, etc. are going to read this! That line sounds about as corny as a bowl of corn flakes! You don't write as well as Suzanne Collins! Are you sure about that comma? Wah wah wah." On and on.

Usually I have no trouble ignoring her. Sometimes what she has to say is actually useful and I take it into consideration. And she will definitely come in handy when I'm going through line edits at the very end of this whole thing.

But these past weeks...

She's been ultra bitter. Let's say someone had their panties in a bunch and since she knew I was watching and doesn't like mistakes, she was afraid to just pull that wedgie and get on with her day. So she took her frustration out on me. It might also have to do with the fact that I'm so close to the end. I've sent out queries to six agents (Eeeeee!!), but more about that in another post. I know I said I'd have this out to my Betas almost a month ago, but I've learned things take longer than I expect and I'm still learning so much every day about writing and my style and all that good stuff I'll never completely have down.

Anyway, I've been working on a new scene I added to the story for the past two weeks. And most of those days, I'd sit down, stare at the page, get frustrated, type a line, erase that line, and watch an episode of Supernatural. Start over the next day. On the bright side, I am all caught up on Supernatural I learned a lot about my writing process.

Last night I was about to get started on that ugly cycle. But! This time I was for sure, for SURE going to get a lot done. And then my Inner Editor started in on the thousands of  reasons why every word I typed out totally sucked.

It was frustrating, kind of like this.

I could feel I was on the edge of a meltdown, so I tried to have one that was like this.

 But it wasn't working because by this point, I was whining like a two year old. So, I made a little rant status on Facebook because that SUPER productive and then danggit, I made a cuppa! (I learned from a Harry Potter cookbook the other day that Cuppa to the English is a cup of tea. As in "Let's go have a cuppa!")

Then with my tea in hand (tea fixes all), I knew what I had to do next. I had to show my Inner Editor which of us is Boss Lady (me). I opened a blank Word doc and started a story off the top of my head without caring in the least bit whether or not it was ridiculous or cheesy or scandalous. It worked! She retreated behind her editor desk with random mumbles about perfection and excellence, but I didn't care because I had the floor again. Score.

I looked at the beginning to the top-of-my-head story and saw that it was, in fact, not bad. Not bad at all. And I reminded myself there is no such thing as perfection, and if I aim for it every time I write, I end up with nothing but wasted time. I have to write my buns off and get a few crappy scenes to get those scenes that really rock. Besides, my Inner Editor will take care of those later.

So, I reminded myself of this:

   Then I gulped down the rest of my delicious tea and got to work. And the scene actually grew and was pretty good, if I do say so!

Cheers.

P.S. It's totally fine if not everyone agrees with what I write as long as I stay true to the story. Write on. 

Rockin' Revisions, Querying Quest, and Bubbly Betas

This last revision part was supposed to be easy. I went through and wrote out what corrections had to me made and then went through and made them. However, in doing so, I found holes in plot and what have you. So. I'm just working that stuff out, and then the book will be...ready for my betas! Back in September, I wrote about my need for beta readers. And I said it would be soon.

The revision part of writing is really hard, but I won't bore you with my whining. It's taken longer than I expected, and I'm sorry to anyone who talked to me about being a beta. I still need you, and I need you soon (for real this time)!

The difference between my betas and this betta fish is...a lot, actually. Hmm.

I'm giving myself until the March 20th to get this baby polished, and then I will have it off to you, my dear beloved betas! I'm in full-force mode because while looking at my calender, I discovered a beautiful lull in my schedule during these next couple weeks. Yay! That means hard core work time.

I'm also doing something very exciting (starting today...right now, after I post this). I'm sending out queries to literary agents! I'm finding egitimate agents I don't have to pay and who follow a code of ethics on a site called the Association of Author's Representatives. I've done my research, and this is the pace to find an agent. I've researched many of them and picked the ones looking for the kind of novel I have written.

Ahhh! I'm absolutely tickled. I think I'm supposed to be terrified, too, but I'm not feeling that. I'm confident that God has me just where He wants me and has given me all I need to succeed. I should hear back from any agent(s) who want to represent me within 3-6 weeks of sending out my query. In that time, I will have sent out my novel to my betas.

So, yes! Good stuff is happening. Thank you to everyone who has been there for me all along. Thank you to my betas for your patience and willingness to help me and for your input I'm sure will be ever so helpful!